(Originally posted on April 19, 2014)
Looking back, I’m almost amazed that kids find it entertaining at all. I mean, they aren’t really the target audience, are they?
Part heaven, part space, or have I found my place?”
What did that mean to us as kids?
Nothing. It meant nothing. It was Gonzo and it was cute. A little bit sad. But now…
And what about “The Magic Store”? Oh, “The Magic Store”… The things that song does to my heart…
This week, I made the decision to quit my job. My last day is April 30th. I haven’t told all that many people yet, but those who have found out have almost exclusively followed my announcement with a variation of the same question:
“Where are you going?” or “What are you going to do?”
I don’t know.
That’s shocking to most people. Full disclosure: It’s shocking to me too. I have a family and a mortgage and I’ve come to appreciate the finer things in life. Like food on the table. And yet here I am. And now for the really crazy part…
I’m not really looking for a job. Not yet. I don’t know how long that will last, but for now, I don’t think I’m supposed to.
I feel like I need to give the dream a try for a while. I don’t know how long that will last. Money may get too tight. I may get too frustrated. I may be taken down a different path. But for now?
Kermit wanted to make it in Hollywood. Gonzo wanted to go to Bombay, India and become a movie star. Big Bird wanted to go to New York City and break into public television. Everyone has a dream.
As kids, we think we’ll achieve our dreams. Actually, they aren’t even our dreams then. They’re plans. That thing, that unattainable thing that we, as cynical adults, look back on as childish naivete? It’s easy to forget that there was a time when we couldn’t think of a single reason why that wouldn’t be our life. Movie star? Sure. Circus performer? You bet. The next Debbie Gibson? Why not? And then adulthood – that crusher of dreams – comes along. What do you mean I can’t major in movie star in college? The circus life isn’t one of glamour? I’m sorry…she goes by Deborah Gibson now?!? Goodbye dreams.
We pay the bills, we raise our families, and we pursue new dreams. And the new dreams are equally magical – just in a more realistic way.
As a wise frog once said, “Who said that every wish would be heard and answered when wished on the morning star? Somebody thought of that and someone believed it. Look what it’s done so far.”
Where have those wishes and dreams gotten us so far?
I’m almost 35 years old, and in many ways I’m starting over. And I’m refusing to accept that the dream is dead. Maybe the mistake all along wasn’t daring to hope that our dreams would come true. Maybe it was thinking that it would be easy.
I’ve heard them calling my name.
Is this the sweet sound that called the young sailors.
The voice might be one and the same.
I’ve heard it too many times to ignore it.
It’s something that I’m supposed to be.
Someday we’ll find it, the rainbow connection.
The lovers, the dreamers and me.